Maybe

Just maybe, its almost that time. As I am writing this, I still fight with myself "Give her a chance, things will be better" That is called hope but how long can hopefulness hold on. It could possibly I have stepped into something unknown; kinda like playing a game with no map and you are only armed with love as the undying fire, faith as the sword to fend off, and hope as a shield to block. The cliche question is what if it comes from your inside? You need to use your own faith against yourself and those doubts.

Truth is I'm turning 24 but I still act like I'm 19. At times I pity myself because of me being like this. What kind of example am I setting for my bro and her? Things not done,  priorities not set, arguing with my parents..... etc
I miss out being a teenager, being only 16 I moved to another country with a totally different culture & lifestyle. Got into high school, didnt made any friends, and when I did, it was all half ass because I was different. Along the same with some of my home country friends. Only one stayed true which is my sis; the rest kinda comes and goes. My sincere wish is that I am about to be 16 to 20 again so that I can have something to talk about to my children. With that wish, comes my ultimate weakness regretting and always looking back.

I need to stop doing that. I should be looking to the future but it is hard. When all my beginning of hopes and dreams was just there, I put them on hold because I wasnt strong enough to see it through. I begin to wonder if I even had any to begin with.

~Radio bleed me a melody~