i realised..

the things that i love..
the people that i care

will just slip away..
no matter how hard i wanna it to stay..
no matter how hard i beg..
no matter how hard i pray not too..
especially the people who gives me support..
who made me happy again..
i dont know it this is some sick joke..

but it hurts really bad..

and my sister ask me why i dont open up to others? this is why..
because when i do, my heart is broken again.. yet i do the same all over again..

now i feel that it is all starting to go downhill..
i'm so weak.. getting swayed around by lil words..
i'm seriously the worst human being to ever walked on earth..

i wish i could tell you how i really feel infront of you in person..
not over some webcam..

i feel terrible that i have the guts to make you fall for me..
make you feel attached to me.. who am i to do that?

what right do i have to love someone like you when i'm thousand of miles away..
what right do i have to even feel anything but love..
what right do i have.. to help you when my world is already in the gravevard..

to think i wanted toask her to the tumblr prom ><
i'm seriously have a fucked up thinking and also fuckedup already body..

i just wanna find someone i can love and care for.. I feel that i'm being love and being cared for ><

i guess i'm will be alone